Assumptions and presumptions – oh how they can get us into trouble!
Assumptions are defined as: “A thing that is accepted as true or as certain to happen, without proof.” Note the “without proof”!!
Presumptions are defined as: “An idea that is taken to be true, and often used as the basis for other ideas, although it is not known for certain.” Note the “although it is not known for certain”!
Our assumption and presumptions can get us in trouble, and cause needless pain for ourselves and others.
Making assumptions and presumptions is a very bad habit and pattern in my life. I’m working to change that. It is not easy to kick this habit! It is what we often hear on the news, read in magazines, and hear from other people.
But God does not want us to base our thinking and conclusions on anything but truth.
Proverbs 18:2 reminds us that we are fools when we base our conclusions on opinions: “A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.”
1 John 4:1 commands us to test what we hear, to determine who the source of the information is from: “Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world.”
Our assumptions and presumptions (“A/P”) cause us to make judgments. Most often, because our A/P’s are not based in truth, we end up being judgmental, and people get hurt.
Proverbs 18:13 states: “If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.” I suggest that often we assume and presume before we hear any “evidence” of facts.
I believe we are quick to speak, and slow to hear, and wait for truth. The Amplified Bible, James 1:19, states: “Understand this, my beloved brothers and sisters. Let everyone be quick to hear [be a careful, thoughtful listener], slow to speak [a speaker of carefully chosen words and], slow to anger [patient, reflective, forgiving];”
James makes it clear that we have a great responsibility to not be assumers and presumers.
Please consider the words the amplified version uses to emphasize our responsibility:
“be a careful, thoughtful listener”
“a speaker of carefully chosen words”
“patient, reflective, forgiving”
Too often my mind is assuming/presuming when I should be a careful, thoughtful listener.
Too often my mind is forming its response to someone instead of using carefully chosen words based upon my having been a careful, thoughtful listener.
Due to my sinful assuming/presuming, I too often fail to be patient, reflective, and forgiving toward others.
What does this look like?
We had friends over, and their little one was playing in the sandbox as my granddaughter left. The next day when she went to the sandbox she found a toy that was apart. Her immediate assumption, that she expressed to me, was that the little boy from yesterday did it. However, I knew it was done another time because I had picked it up a few days before, and it was apart then. I used that to instruct her on making assumptions! She had deemed the little boy guilty, when he wasn’t. She made a conclusion based upon lack of complete information. There was no first hand knowledge.
Our expectations of others (generally not of ourselves, unfortunately) are often based in what we assume and presume they should be doing.
How often do we make the same mistake? We believe we have all the information, but God is the only One who truly has all the details. Therefore, we need to remember to seek Him for guidance before we make conclusions.
But God is so merciful and gracious! He corrects me, and redirects me through repentance to stop with my A/P’s. He leads me in ways of righteousness, for His Name’s sake [Psalm 23:4].
When I begin with my A/P’s, I’m now more inclined to pray and ask God to change me, to help me be a careful, thoughtful listener, forming my thoughts and responses so that I have carefully chosen words, being patient, reflective, and forgiving. I cannot do any of that without abiding in Christ. I need His Holy Spirit to guide me in and through that process.
1 Corinthians 13:7 [ESV] helps me on that path: “Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” The NIV words this verse this way: “It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
God reminds me in Galatians 6:7 that how I behave toward others is what I can expect to receive: “Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap.”
That truth often stops me in my tracks when I start on the P/A path. I quickly apologize to God for the thoughts and He helps me protect, trust, hope and persevere in all things, as I bear in love, believe, hope and endure.
All this requires a true relationship with God through the Lord Jesus. It requires we acknowledge our sinful state, and our inability to change that without accepting Jesus as Lord and Savior. It requires that we accept that He bore our sins on the cross, conquered death, and rose from the grave, and is now sitting at the Father’s side. It requires that we have hope in His return, and our eternal destiny with Him in the new heaven and new earth that are coming soon!
When we have this relationship with Jesus, we can destroy the presumptions and assumptions by taking our thoughts captive, and allowing Him to redirect us. 2 Corinthians 10:5 states it this way: “We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ…” Our A/P’s are against God. We shouldn’t want to do anything that is against God.
1 Corinthians 13:6 states: “It does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.” This passage, in context, talks about what love is. I want a reputation of caring and loving others. Therefore, I need to rejoice with truth. Thus, I cannot be assuming and presuming!
Not only do we assume and presume in our interpersonal relationships, we also assume and presume in our relationship with the Lord. That will be the subject for next week!
Do you want to honor God by eliminating assuming and presuming? If so, what steps will you take to accomplish this? Perhaps you might start with placing some of the above-referenced Scriptures on notecards and place them where you see them regularly. You can also ask someone to help you be accountable to the goal of “be a careful, thoughtful listener”, “a speaker of carefully chosen words”, and being “patient, reflective, forgiving”.
If I can help you on this journey, please contact me at: ButGodCares@gmail.com
Living for Jesus, Donna
P.S. If this has helped you, please feel free to share it with others!
Note: If the verses for Bible references do not appear when you hover over them, go directly to the website, and they should appear for you.
Copyright 2022 Donna Shappy
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